I had an encounter Friday night with a low-life, a person who is so miserable she feels the need to be demeaning to others, to bring everyone else down. If she were a cartoon you would have to draw stink lines around her to totally capture her nastiness.
Throughout the evening various people were coming to me and complaining about a negative experience they had with her. One of my friends was so fired up from the last time she encountered said low-life that she wanted to “take things outside”. I managed to talk her off the ledge, explaining that the low-life doesn’t know any better. She has her low-life friends who encourage her behaviour and laugh alongside her when she demeans others.
Irony has a fun way of sneaking up on you, just as I finished explaining why you should be the bigger person to my friend; the low-life decides I’m her next target. She makes eye contact with me from across the, what felt like an even smaller, bar, I’m thinking “Don’t look it in the eyes”. Too late my less than five second glance must have offended her so much she decided to give me the “kiss goodbye” gesture, you know when you put two or three tips of your fingers to your lips, smack and give the buh-bye wave. It may sound small but it was meant in a threatening way and taken as such. I was slightly shocked, I’ve never had a positive experience with this low-life but really someone looks at you and your first response is to intimidate them? Not smile, not even give a half-I-recognize-you-and-you-recognize-me-grin, nope you go defensive and threaten someone you have little to no contact with in your everyday life. Well, she has now officially offended me; my ego is screaming “How dare you? Do you know who I am?”, ha yeah, like I’m a big shot. Immediately thinking my friend isn’t too far off wanting to “take it outside”.
In the light of day I got to thinking about the whole situation. This low-life chooses every day to wake up and be miserable. For whatever reason life has turned her cold and her only way of knowing how to interact with people is to be a horrible person. Is it really her fault? Her low-life friends laugh and encourage her on, she’s being rewarded for her behaviour, and no one has ever really stood up to her because she is scary. And because of her behaviour I have decided to make a New Life Resolution.
Not just a New Year Resolution, a New Life one. A resolution that I will have to work on every day to keep and will be a lot harder than any vain driven resolution I’ve made before. I resolve to be a better person from today on. I will not contribute to turning anyone cold like the low-life I encountered Friday has been turned cold.
My first goal is to tell everyone I love and cherish why I think they are great, including me. I will wake up each day, look in the mirror and tell myself what I love about me and what makes me amazing, I will choose something different every day. That’s where it will be hard, to find something different every day, but I know there are enough good things about me to carry through my life. I will also tell my friends and family when they are being amazing and what about them makes them great. If I see someone is having a bad go of things I will take the time out of my life to tell them how they have impacted my life positively, and remind people why they are important when I can.
My second goal is to take a page from my parents’ books and help others. If someone calls on me for help or to volunteer I will. I’m not saying I will let people take advantage of me by saying yes every time, but when I can say yes, I will. There’s a girl I know from my hometown who battled and survived cancer, She did this through her personal strength, her family and friends, and a very kind stranger. This stranger was a stem cell/bone marrow donor. When I heard that she has been given 6 more years, and many more to come, and the world is truly better with her in it, I thought, “I can do that”. I immediately looked it up, onematch.com, and registered. I received an envelope in the mail and simply swapped my mouth and sent it back to the Canadian Blood Services. I also decided to be a donor, I don’t need my body when I’m gone, but someone else may. And like my mom, who does so as often as she can, I will donate blood. Again, I don’t need it, but someone else may.
My third and final goal is not to contribute to any woman’s low self-esteem. We all struggle enough with our own body issues, I don’t need to be a part of that or a negative force in anyone’s life. I will not make fun or talk negatively about any woman’s appearance. There’s a saying “there’s something about her I hate about myself”. Think about that the next time you catch yourself letting another woman’s appearance be the focus of your conversation. And we’ve all done it, we’ve all been where there’s nothing else to talk about and we find ourselves poking fun at someone else or commenting “wow, she’s let herself go”. Anything along those lines, I will no longer be a part of it. I think this will be the toughest goal I’ll make, but I know it may possibly be the most important one for me to be a better person.
I’m not saying you need to do the same, but would love if you did resolve to be a better person and set your own goals on how you plan to get there. Don’t be a low-life who is only remembered for your stink lines.
Hey just read this article and found it to be very inspiring and oddly enough, I am kind of doing the same thing on facebook! I am basically using facebook as an outlet towards what I think is a deserving goal, which is simply put my happiness. The thing is that this is not a selfish endavour as the people that I care about and are close to me, are part of my happiness so I will try to help them out as best as I can. I also like you perspective about volunteering and donations, I might give that a try myself- we will see.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, the details of the project that I have been doing is called the pursuit of happiness, in which I try to find one thing a day that added some sort of joy to my day, and post it on facebook. I have it set up where I asked whoever was interested to "like" the idea and added them all to this private album. By doing that, I found out it worked out really well as I all the people on their have shown interest and have been supportive of the idea, in which I have been extremely appreciate for. Additonally, I have it set up so that this project won't be a burden for me as I pursue it, so I post the pictures with the info explaining what it is when I can do it; however I try my best to still take a picture a day so everyday I am searching for those great things in life that make it great and a privillege to be alive.
Again, good luck on this project and I hope it works out great for you.
-Thanks